|Haha he got tasered for speeding lol!|
“The fact that the tickets cost £100 each, all of which goes straight into the force’s budget, does not necessarily mean that officers will be handing them out like takeaway flyers,” insisted Jack Dixon, a spokesman for the Association of Chief Police Officers. “Although offenders will be asked if they’d like to bring a friend or partner, in which case we’ll drive right up that driver’s arse in an unmarked car until the opportunity to sell another ticket presents itself. There’s no reason why punishment for motoring offences shouldn’t have a fun social aspect.”
The ACPO hopes that its members will soon have raised enough cash to make Jeremy Clarkson a tempting offer to narrate a DVD compilation, which will then replace the slideshow.
“Remember,” said Mr Dixon, “This hilarious compendium of scathing Clarkson wit will not be available in shops.”
The ACPO is also considering a similar scheme for criminals who hold up convenience stores, off-licences and post offices, he added, since there seems to be plenty of YouTube footage of people getting that hilariously wrong too.
“I wonder if Mad Frankie Fraser would be interested in a spot of voice-over work?” he mused.