|Nah, it was like that when you left it, mate|
Community representatives said there were plenty of vacant off-road parking spaces round the back of their decaying tower blocks where public-spirited locals could keep a watchful eye on the luxurious 4x4s and people-carriers, whilst their owners were indoors offering the full benefit of their rose-tinted worldview to any addict incapable of running away fast enough.
“This scheme’s fackin’ brilliant right?” said problem person Sammi-Jo Potts. “That poncy twat’s only just gorn an’ announced it, an’ already I bin offered like fifty nicker a wheel offuv any Merc or Beemer yeah an’ a tenner for every satnav. ‘Assa noo Xbox sorted for startas yeah innit.”