Government Invites British Public To Nominate 40% Of British Public For Cuts

The government unveiled its latest ‘Bog Society’ measures today, by asking the British public which 40% of the British public it would like to see cut.

“Of course, we wouldn’t dream of actually implementing such swingeing cuts,” smiled chancellor George Osborne, as he signed a purchase order for 100,000 litres of nerve gas. “It’s all just harmless pretend, like imagining the world’s best supergroup or an all-time dream football team.”

Answers so far given range from “let’s get shot of all those ghastly poor council-estate scum once and for all” from a Mrs.The Hon.S.G.Cameron to “I don’t give a shit, as long as it’s not me” from a Mr.J.Public.