Friday 3 April 2009

NATO Celebrates Birthday With Oddly-Shaped Cake

With Western leaders meeting in Strasbourg to celebrate the 60th anniversary of the North Atlantic Treaty Organisation, Russian Prime Minister Vladimir the Putin sent the organisation a birthday card featuring his best wishes and a map of the world with a big arrow pointing to the Atlantic Ocean.

President Obama - dressed up like Ozymandias from the Watchmen movie - delighted partygoers by cutting slices out of a big cake shaped like Europe would be if it were attached to North America rather than the eastern half of the Eurasian landmass.

Leaders of the other NATO countries were also in fancy dress for the occasion. Germany's Angela Merkel created a stir as Silk Spectre II, while a bright blue Silvio Berluscruki stunned everyone into silence by arriving at the party naked and waving his genitals.

New boy Nicolas Sarkozy - who, cruelly, had not been told to come in costume - sat alone in the corner crying because none of the other children wanted to talk to him, until his wife arrived to take him home to his stamp collection.

After blancmange and jelly had been served, Gordon Brown - dressed as the boring middle-aged nerd who doesn't really achieve anything - suggested that everyone should tell scary stories, but wet his pants when President Obama mischievously told him that a big bad bogey-man who lives in a dark cave in Afghanistan was coming to eat him all up.

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