Drinking too much caffeine can cause people to have hallucinations, according to a wide-eyed researcher from Durham University.
Psychologist Simon Jones checked the caffeine levels of 200 students before asking them if they had heard voices in their heads or seen any ghosts recently. His results showed that those students who consumed caffeine equivalent to seven cups of coffee a day or more were three times more prone to insane hallucinations than those who restricted their intake to one cup.
"This ground-breaking research proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that serious caffeine abusers are dicing with madness," warned Dr Jones. "Most of those who told me in all seriousness that they heard voices were apparently found collapsed and laughing hysterically outside my office not five minutes later."
A little later, Durham's Dean of Psychology announced that he would be undertaking some research of his own into a possible link between academic studies and excessive credulity.
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