|A salubrious place to bury a PR problem|
5,000 troops have already been specially trained to sensitively shout: “Perkins! You’re fucking mental” at fellow soldiers at the first signs of instability, so they can be transferred to secluded barrack blocks conveniently hidden behind towering walls instead of trying to bottle up their traumas until they return to civvy street and upset the general public with their unmanly behavioural problems.
“I’m s-so g-g-grateful to the army for sh-showing me some helpful p-p-p-Powerpoint slides,” shuddered former combat stress victim Rifleman Barry Snopes. “Now I c-c-can offer p-prospective employers a history of m-m-mental illness, as well as th-thirty d-d-different ways to k-k-kill a towelhead.”