|Don't bother about the 'Inbound' part, you won't be needing it|
HSBC has recently hit out at chancellor George Osborne’s plans to levy a tiny proportion of the bank’s massive profits, which tripled to £12bn last year.
“London is ideally positioned as an international financial centre, what with its easily-distracted regulators, the splendid laxity with which corporate taxation is enforced and the superb generosity of the UK government in bankrupting the entire country for our sole benefit, and we have been clear that it is our preference to remain headquartered here for as long as we can continue to get away with it,” said an HSBC spokesman. “However, if it really starts to look like the party’s over, I suppose we might consider inflicting the benefits of our financial acumen on China once again.”
Meanwhile, an inscrutable spokesman for the Chinese government told reporters: “Ancient Chinese proverb say: When you are poor, neighbours close by will not come; once you become rich, you'll be surprised by visits from ‘relatives’ from afar.”