Japanese Minister Under Pressure To Resign For Telling The Truth About Lying

Nobody would have a problem if he'd just kept lying

Japan’s justice minister, Yanagida Minoru, is facing demands for his resignation today, after admitting to supporters in Hiroshima Prefecture that his job was easy and simply involved covering his complete ignorance of departmental issues with one of two stock fibs in parliament: “I won’t comment on individual cases” and “I’m acting in accordance with the law and the evidence.”

Opposition conservatives have reacted with fury to hearing the minister’s frank confession.

“We fully expect members of parliament to lie through their teeth and cover up a blissful ignorance of what goes on in their departments,” commented one former minister. “After all, we’re no experts. An election is a popularity contest, and has nothing to do with expertise, insight or understanding of what actually goes on. That is how representative democracy works. How dare Mr Yanagida drop the pretence?”

“Er… what I meant to say is that Yanagida Minoru has brought unforgivable shame upon himself and his party by his cynical attitude to important matters of state,” he added, under withering glares from parliamentary colleagues. “I'm afraid that whatever is the matter with him, it appears to be catching.”

Prime minister Kan Naoto later gave Mr Yanagida a severe warning, ordering him to remember the importance of maintaining a charade at all times, not just during parliamentary debates.