Hitler Encouraged Allied Extremists To Invade Europe, Say Police

Without all that Nuremberg hoohah, say police, these extremists might never have been recruited

Britain’s police chiefs tonight expanded on their earlier statement that the rise of far-right groups like the English Defence League is encouraging Islamic extremism, pointing out that the violent invasion of mainland Europe in 1944 by militant Allied groups was similarly encouraged by Hitler.

“If I could go back in time,” explained Detective Superintendant Savage, “What I’d say to Mr Hitler and his boys is, ‘Look, could you just tone it down a little, lads? You’re being a bit counter-productive here.’”

“All that patriotic marching up and down in jackboots just gave extremist troublemakers like Eisenhower and Churchill the excuse they needed to justify terror bombing and fighting in the streets,” he continued, “And look how that ended up. Instead of embodying Hitler’s visionary ideas of order, Europe was forcibly converted at gunpoint to liberal democracy, which makes life bloody awkward for us coppers.”