Cameron Lays Wreath To Commemorate Death Of War Veterans’ Dreams Of A Fairer Society

Try not to remember this bit

Under the impassive gaze of Prince Charles, prime minister David Cameron solemnly laid a wreath on the Cenotaph in a sombre farewell to the better, fairer Britain which returning soldiers fought so hard to create.

“We must never forget the sacrifices made and the dedication showed by those who served our country in the Second World War,” he said. “However, we should most certainly forget that what they overwhelmingly wanted to come home to was a decent, caring society in which poverty, inequality and the rigid class system would be banished forever, to be replaced by a caring welfare state, universal healthcare, a decent education system based on merit rather than social status, fair working conditions and decent, affordable housing.”

“To think of such things at this time - or indeed at any other time - would be a grave disservice to the honoured memory of those 30,000 brave chaps who died today, or whatever,” he added.

“VJ Day - the day the Second World War ended, or so old ‘Two-Brains’ Willetts tells me - is a time for this generation to reflect and show its gratitude to our veterans for their bravery, dedication and sacrifice,” he explained, to mounting catcalls from elderly veterans. “It’s certainly not a time to ask what they were fighting for. We don’t do that any more, do we?”