“How dare the BBC field somebody who is skilled at answering back?” intoned creepy backbench android John Redwood, the last-minute stand-in in for David Laws, the Chief Secretary to the Treasury, who pulled out in protest and is making repeated efforts to hold his breath until he turns blue. “The government expects to be given an easy target - Liam Byrne, maybe, or Bob Ainsworth - to hold up to public ridicule.”
The transformation of Mr Campbell from hated spinmeister to revered icon has been one of the most remarkable political journeys ever taken by a partisan civil servant. After years of being reviled by the nation for his blatant lies about the circumstances leading up to the invasion of Iraq, Mr Campbell began to elicit sympathy from TV viewers when he appeared to suffer a complete nervous breakdown during a relentless interrogation by the BBC’s dreaded Andrew Marr, bursting into tears shortly after inserting a shallot into his right nostril.
Next, Mr Campbell unexpectedly lifted the hearts of the nation in the dark days of the interregnum following the election, remaining calm and unruffled when Sky News’ political editor on behalf of the Conservative Party, Adam Boulton, unexpectedly went berserk live on air and physically attacked him by repeatedly jabbing a potentially lethal finger at himself.
Now he finds himself the unwitting victim of a clumsy, failed attempt by Downing Street to interfere with the editorial independence of the BBC.
“I’m expecting to receive my halo from His Holiness any day now,” admitted Mr Campbell. “He understands very well the value of a first-rate propagandist - in fact, he tells me he had it drummed into him in childhood.”
Meanwhile, BBC bosses say they are surprised that nobody has yet objected to the inclusion of Piers Morgan in tonight’s broadcast.
No comments:
Post a Comment