Gordon Brown suffered a shock defeat in the House of Commons today, as MPs voted to let former Gurkha soldiers live out their days in the UK in exchange for Mr Brown living out his in a remote, mountainous corner of Nepal.
The motion, proposed by the Liberal Democrats, was passed by 267 votes to 241 - with many on the government benches abstaining, despite Mr Brown furiously jabbing at a hand-held remote. Labour MPs twitched and groaned in their seats, with wisps of blue smoke curling up from their ears, as opposition MPs filed into the lobbies to overturn the government's unpopular decision to only grant residence rights to Gurkhas who could explain the LBW rule, take 'Britain's Got Talent' seriously and say "Imagine an imaginary menagerie manager imagining managing an imaginary menagerie" whilst performing a morris dance.
After the result was declared, Immigration Minister Phil Dumbas staggered to his feet with his hair on fire, and told the cheering chamber through gritted teeth, "Nngg the government respects the will of the House of Commonnnzz," before his head exploded.
The vote is not binding, but a large crate - addressed to Nepal and containing a shiny £2 coin attached to a tripwire - has nevertheless been delivered to Downing Street. The Prime Minister is still inside Number Ten at the time of writing, but experienced political commentators expect him to rush into the crate within the next few hours.
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