Long-suffering customers of nPower say they are delighted with the £2m fine which will be added to their eye-watering bills, after industry regulator Ofgem fined the energy supplier for its blatant mistreatment of complaints.
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| These things don't fall out of cornflakes packets, you know |
“Last year we only made a token £245m,” sobbed nPower’s chief commercial officer, Kevin Piles. “As a result, we were sadly forced to increase our profit margins from paltry £1.50 per customer to a very reasonable £9. This swingeing £2m fine completely wipes out that modest gain, probably, so I’m afraid we’ll just have to pass it straight on to our customers.”
“If anyone’s got a problem with that,” he added, “Please feel free to write to us and we’ll bung your complaints straight into a furnace at one of our coal-fired power stations. That’ll keep our costs down a bit.”
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