Theresa May Promises To Put Plenty of Police Out On The Streets

PC Savage here has already identified a nice spot right next to your driveway

The home secretary, Theresa May, has responded swiftly to claims in Chief Inspector of Constabulary Sir Denis O’Connor’s review that police do not take anti-social behaviour as seriously as other crimes, by agreeing to meet his core demand of putting more officers on the streets.

Sir Dennis had earlier argued that tackling anti-social behaviour “really mattered” to the public, saying the police had “retreated from the streets” since the 1970s and treated incidents differently from other crimes.

Mrs May responded by blaming the Labour Party for everything, pointing out that it was well-known to the police that 99% of all crime was committed against Daily Mail readers by a hard core of habitual Labour voters, and promised faithfully that the cuts she is about to inflict upon forces’ budgets would put thousands of police officers out on the streets in the next couple of years.