Police Warn Public To Look Out For One-Eared Man With Two Ears

Greater Manchester Police have warned the public to be on the alert for Michael O'Donnell, a desperate criminal who cut off his ear to escape from an ambulance, by releasing a photograph of him with a full complement of ears.

"O'Donnell could be anywhere," admitted Assistant Chief Constable Ian Hopkins at an open-air press conference in Levenshulme, where the HMP Salford escapee's getaway car was found abandoned. "He is a master of disguise, with an uncanny ability to blend in to the scenery and pass unnoticed in any crowd."

"Is there any tell-tale feature that could possibly give away this criminal mastermind?" asked a journalist with a heavily-bloodstained gauze pad taped to the side of his head.

Mr Hopkins stared long and hard at the notably symmetrical photograph of O'Donnell, thoughtfully stroking his earlobe for several minutes before conceding that the dangerous robber had nothing which might help to distinguish him from the general population.