Bank Of England Governor Found Colouring In ‘Textbook’

Arriving early for a meeting in governor Sir Mervyn King’s office after he publicly praised government economic policies - which have caused misery to millions, damaged Britain’s credit rating and plunged the country back into recession - as a “textbook response”, unsuspecting officials at the Bank of England inadvertently surprised him in the act of colouring in a picture of a fire engine with a red crayon.

George Osborne has gone through five copies

“In the light of the discovery that Sir Mervyn’s bookshelves contain nothing but children's activity books, the Bank of England would like to clarify the statement he made earlier,” admitted an embarrassed spokesman, Rob Blind. “Any book which contains words is, technically, a textbook, and a hasty check appears to indicate that every item in Mr King’s extensive reference library does in fact contain not just line drawings, but an accompanying word or two saying what each one depicts. With that proviso in mind, the Bank of England board fully endorses his comments.”

"There's plenty of educational content, too," he insisted. "You'd be surprised how many farmyard animals the governor can name. He's very bright for a 64-year-old."

“Perhaps, in hindsight, we might have sought confirmation that the Mont Blanc pen cap Sir Mervyn proudly displays in his breast pocket when he chairs Monetary Policy Committee meetings was actually attached to a Mont Blanc pen,” observed Mr Blind ruefully. “On the other hand, this does explain a lot of the modern art hanging in our junior executives’ offices.”