Unpopular current affairs-based satirical blog The Nev Filter is to charge internet users for the privilege of shrugging their shoulders at its intemperate rants, announced proprietor Neville Shite today.
"Frankly, I'm sick of busting my considerable gut scouring the world's headlines for a piss-taking angle every day - or whenever I can be arsed - and getting sod-all in return, other than a hollow feeling of having ineffectually vented my spleen," he told himself over a cup of coffee this morning. "If the John Thomas Press can charge readers for the dubious privilege of checking the whippet-racing results on the Whitby Gazette website, I reckon I should be able to get away with demanding a quid for each painstakingly-researched diatribe."
"Readers will be directed to a completely bona fide payment site based in Ukraine," he explained, "Which will invite them to submit their credit card details, and offer them genuine penis-enlargement sweets on a daily basis."
The media mongrel then went on to say that the charges would be applied retrospectively for articles already read.
"I reckon you all owe me about £500 each," Nev told his readers. "Come on, cough up. I fancy some flying lessons."
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