Jubilant football fans were still dancing in the streets today, after Ingurlund's stunning World Cup victory yesterday.
With the Ingurlund side drawn against Alaska, Sealand and Pluto in Group C of the tournament, the coveted cup is coming home to Ingurlund without the need for a single kick.
"How can we lose?" smiled team manager Fabio Capello. "The Alaskans have to float all the way to South Africa on an ice floe. The current's against them, the polar bear will be getting hungry and the ice will melt soon anyway. Even if they crossed the Atlantic safely, they'd only trip over their mukluks and die of heatstroke."
"As for Sealand - the abandoned artillery platform in the Channel which was occupied by a retired major who declared its independence in 1967 - they haven't actually had a football team since their ball went over the side in 2003 and floated away," he added. "And the Plutonian team won't reach Earth until 2012. Can I have the trophy now, please? I've cleared a place on the mantelpiece."
World Cup organisers have today sounded a note of caution, however, pointing out that the draw only covers the first round of the tournament - meaning that the victors of Group C will still have to play against other teams, some of whom are actually quite good and know what a goal looks like.
"It don't matter," yelled a drunken football fan lying in a gutter in Kentish Town. "After smashing the eskimoes, the pirate crew and the little green men, our brave boys will be so confident nuffink will stop 'em. Ingurlund! Ingurlund! Ingurlund!"
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