Friday, 13 February 2009

Government Prevents Evil Foreigner From Spreading Message About Evil Foreigners

The British government has come under fire for barring Dutch far-right MP Geert Hitlers from entering the country to show his controversial film, 'Muslim Süss' to members of the House of Lords.

The foreigner-baiting former Tory cabinet minister Michael Portillo said that the government had made a "populist twit" and "bigot" world famous by detaining Mr Hitlers at Heathrow and sending him back to Holland. Dutch foreign ministry spokesman Christof Prommersberger also deplored the expulsion, saying: "any Dutch parliamentarian should be able to travel freely in the European Union. In fact, the further from Holland, the better."

However, the government pointed out that, after recent calls for apologies from Jeremy Clarkson, Carol Thatcher, drugs advisor Professor David Nutt and education expert Professor Adrian Smith for flagrantly speaking their minds, the banning of Mr Hitlers from the UK was a 'no-brainer'.

"Britain fought a long and bloody world war so that people could have the fundamental right to freedom of speech," explained Foreign Secretary Miliband One. "But that was all a long time ago, and times have changed. Nowadays all those old-fashioned human rights are nothing but a dusty collection of quaint old notions whose day has passed, thanks to the very real threat of international terrorism. What's far more important nowadays is to watch out for all these evil Muslim fundamentalists who would cheerfully murder us all in our beds in the name of the Prophet, given half a chance. Which is pretty much what Mr Hitlers is saying in his film, come to think of it. And, er, that's why we clearly had to ban him."

"What part of that don't you understand?" he added.

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