Man Tells Joke

A man on the telly told a joke on Friday, it has been reported by infuriated media watchdogs.

BBC switchboards were jammed with complaints after 5.7m horrified viewers found themselves laughing at the man’s joke.

“We will, of course, be mounting a full internal investigation into this alleged joke incident,” promised Director General Mark Thompson. “We take allegations of humour very seriously at the BBC - and if the man is found to have said anything remotely funny, he will be taken to a place of judgement, i.e. the Daily Express offices, and hanged from the neck until dead.”

Meanwhile, the ghost of Les Dawson’s long-suffering mother-in-law is said to have contacted the tabloid press via a medium, complaining that her afterlife has been made intolerable by the long-dead comedian’s shameful and derogatory references to her over the course of his long career.

“Whooooo,” she told reporters.