Wednesday, 30 July 2008

Latest Californian Earthquake 'Not as Good As The Last One'

News agencies were distraught today as they discovered the extent of the devastation caused by the earthquake that struck 29 miles south-east of Los Angeles.

Buildings trembled slightly in LA and San Diego and millions of people survived without a scratch as the eastern seaboard of the United States failed to slide into the Pacific Ocean.

“It’s a news disaster,” said one crying reporter. “First we had the hurricane that fizzled out before it had a chance to hurl large swathes of America into the stratosphere. Then that 747 brushed off what should have been a catastrophic explosion, leaving us with nothing but a handful of moany passengers whingeing that the oxygen masks didn’t quite fulfil their expectations. Weston-super-Mare’s pier goes up in smoke, and there’s not even a smouldering, carbonised tramp to show for it. Now this. What won’t go horrifically wrong next?”

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