Speaking at the Security Document World Conference in London, a senior police officer has warned that despite a huge investment in CCTV cameras, Britain has failed to cut crime. Although the UK had more TV cameras than any other European country, said Detective Chief Inspector Mike Neville, “no thought” had gone into how to use them, and they had solved only 3% of London’s street robberies.
“A big problem is that although we have cameras on every high street and middle-class area, there’s nobody at the other end actually watching,” he said. “Perhaps this is something we should look at. We’re also developing software that can track distinctive brand logos worn by criminals - such as the word ‘Swag’, which often appears on hessian sacks carried by ne’er-do-wells and ruffians. And anybody wearing a Lonsdale sweatshirt is obviously a chav and, therefore, clearly a dangerous criminal who should be taken into custody and detained indefinitely.”
Another problem identified by the dogged detective was that criminals were not afraid of cameras. “We should put remote-controlled gun turrets on street cameras,” he suggested. “Then they’ll think twice before sticking two fingers up at us after an evening on the lash.”
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