Venezuelan TV channel Televen has pulled The Simpsons from its morning schedules, deeming the long-running cartoon series “inappropriate” for children.
In its place, schedulers are running repeats of Baywatch Hawaii – voted the worst ever TV import by UK television executives in 2004 – which features impossibly-built female lifeguards in tiny costumes bouncing along beaches in slow motion.
“The anti-social behaviour of the proto-terrorist Bart Simpson provides an unsuitable role-model for young boys,” said a station executive in Caracas. “And Lisa Simpson thinks too much for a girl. Women were put on earth to have so much plastic surgery that even a Cyberman would think they were a bit artificial, so that lecherous, shallow goons can salivate over their spherical rubber boobs. Baywatch clearly teaches our young children the important things in Venezuelan life.”
“And this later version doesn’t have that drunk guy in it, either,” he added, “Which is a bonus.”
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