“If you look as hot as Amanda Knox, who cares if you murdered some dowdy bint or not?” agreed every newspaper on both sides of the Atlantic today, after the totty in question was sensationally declared not guilty in Italy last night.
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| Now dry your eyes and get your baps out |
The vital factor which has emerged since her initial conviction four years ago, according to the finest legal minds in the news industry, is that Miss Knox is one hot little minx who clearly loves a bit of it. Another vital piece of evidence that was missed – which was immediately obvious to America’s top commentators, but mysteriously overlooked by greasy, incompetent wop prosecutors - is that she is unmistakeably American.
The media world is now clamouring for the exclusive and unexpurgated publishing and film rights to every explicit detail of Miss Knox’s red-hot sex games, which may or may not have involved raunchily sticking a kitchen knife into some bird’s neck.
Her former boyfriend walked too, it seems, if anyone is interested. However, he is not nearly as photogenic - or indeed American - being nothing but an unappealingly hairy-arsed wop who will be lucky to get booked for Channel 5’s Celebrity Big Brother next year and is probably the real murderer anyway.
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