The Japanese whaling fleet is returning to port, after a disappointing season in which it missed its quota of 850 minke whales by 40%.
Japan’s fisheries agency blamed sabotage by environmental activists for the failure, claiming that 31 hunting days had been lost due to protests.
The whaling fleet also failed to catch a single fin whale, because none had been sighted. However, the agency spokesman claimed this as a success, saying, “Hopefully we have eradicated fin whale infestation from the world’s oceans forever. These pests have plagued mariners for centuries, chewing holes in ships’ wainscoting, crawling into their cupboards and eating all the ship’s biscuits, then leaving their ghastly droppings all over the decks.”
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