Monday, 18 April 2011

Scientist Proves Imaginary Character Ate Fictional Meal A Day Earlier

Professor Colin Humphreys - an expert on gallium nitrides, electron microscopy and high-temperature aerospace materials at Imperial College, Cambridge – has brought all of his specialist knowledge of electrons and stuff to bear on determining precisely when a carpenter’s son for whom no historical evidence exists might have invited some friends round for dinner.

Science proves this happened on a Wednesday
“I was mapping some dopants in silicon and other semiconductor devices the other day,” explained Prof. Humphreys, “And what I saw led me to the startling conclusion that, for no readily apparent reason, my imaginary friend Jesus had obviously scheduled his dinner party on a Wednesday, according to the old Jewish calendar, rather than the Thursday of the lunar calendar which everyone else was using. Obviously, all his pals realised his mistake when they received their invitations - otherwise he’d have looked a right charlie on the night, wouldn’t he, sitting in front of a huge spread with no guests?”

“It’s all in my stunning book, ‘The Mystery of The Last Supper, and Other Whodathunkit Applications of Electron Energy-Loss Spectroscopy,’ published today by the Cambridge University Press,” said the respected metallurgist proudly.

A spokesman for Cambridge University told eager reporters to watch out for other exciting believe-it-or-not moneyspinners to be published soon, including Professor Stephen Hawking’s incredible-but-true discovery of Narnia in his wardrobe.


Socrates said...

It was in my wardrobe, actually.

Nev said...

Then what was Stephen Hawking doing in your bedroom?