Tuesday, 3 March 2009

Eddie Izzard Pokes BNP With Spoons

Eddie Izzard has been visiting Manchester to launch a campaign against the British National Party in the run-up to the European parliamentary elections, amid growing concerns that far-right is seeking to capitalise on people's fears about immigration.

"What? Yes! Right. Jam," the well-known comic and actor told the assembled journalists. "Jam, that's what I've brought you all here to talk about. Racists don't make jam, do they? No! Or do they? Golliwogs! What's going on there? 'Achtung, mein fuhrer! Ve haf come up viz ze vunderbar scheme to undermine ze famous Blitz spirit of ze hated Englanders viz zis cute liddle cartoon character.' 'Why are you speaking like that, Goering? How many times must I tell you not to speak with your mouth full?'"

"Hitler farted all the time, he was famous for it - vegetarian diet, yes, hmm," continued Mr Izzard to himself. "'Ah, Benito, my old friend, welcome to Germany - look up there! Seagull! - parp - dammit! Another brilliant gag ruined! Kesselring! Invade Greece! What? Yes, take a factor-30 sunscreen. Heil me.' So, yes, I do wear women's clothes, but in an empowering kind of way. Good link, eh?"

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