|May 5th could be full of flaming Zeroes|
“Wa Ren is a creature without honour,” they proclaimed dutifully as, with futile hopes for their eventual rebirth, they strapped on their traditional thousand vote lucky-charm belts. “It is our proud and sacred destiny to sacrifice our seats for the god-emperor Nikuregu.”
“Banzai!” they sobbed as they set off towards their waiting zeroes.
Their dying wish is to hurl themselves at a promising Labour target, plummeting desperately down the polls in the remote hope of taking at least one of their bitterest enemies to the bottom with them.
Labour campaigners, however, expressed a horrified scorn for the councillors’ meaningless self-immolation.
“Those deluded yellow bastards are such easy targets,” said one grizzled veteran. “This is going to be a real turkey shoot.”
“In more ways than one,” he added.