Cameron’s Bright Idea For Economic Recovery Involves Mortgages People Can’t Afford

It's a foolproof recovery plan

Britain’s economic future is assured, says prime minister David Cameron, if poor people take out vast mortgages they can’t afford to repay.

According his brilliant plan, the government – i.e. you, the taxpayer – will underwrite their naïvely optimistic borrowing of 95% of their mortgages, and cheerfully fork mountains of cash into the bankers’ gaping maws when their customers inevitably default.

“It’s time to reset the housing market back to the boom years, before the banks collapsed due to lending vast mortgages to poor people who couldn’t afford to repay them,” smiled an upbeat Mr Cameron.

“What? he added.